Monday, April 15, 2013

An Engineer Bites the Dust

I’m concerned that my songs celebrating the joys of engineering make it look like I am losing my cynical edge, which is very important for comedy.  Therefore I submit the following “anthem” for Technical Employees with lower levels of loyalty. 

It's a parody of Queen’s…
Really, do you need this one spelled out?

Folks work wearily, long each day,
Morale at an all-time low,
One call from companies far away,
They’re quickly ready to go
They’re all ready, They’re all ready to quit
'Cause their bosses treat them all like a shmoe
Other departments act real flip,
Asking, "How do we know…?"

An engineer bites the dust
An engineer bites the dust
Well it’s time to move on; Well it’s time to move on
An engineer bites the dust
Hey, they’re gonna escort you
An engineer bites the dust

How do you think the place will get along,
without them, one and all?
You can’t train monkeys to do what they do,
Cause they won’t write protocols

No one’s happy, no one’s satisfied
How soon till they all are free
Hear them sing as they take a trip
This darn place it ain't for me

An engineer bites the dust
An engineer bites the dust
An engineer bites the dust
An engineer bites the dust
There are plenty of ways you can get outta here
And be a lab re-ject
You can quit or
Throw a fit or
You could just get bit
by a special pro-ject.
Now they’re ready, yes they’re ready to go
Like a gang of thundering moose,
Bringin' a res-me', they take a trip,
Those nerds are on the loose.

(Repeat chorus until laid off)


Bruce Fieggen said...

HAHA! That was me. I bit the dust a few times, including once with your company. But at least I left your place with a bang. Remember that 'I quit!' letter?

Jeff McGinley said...

Thanx...I remember it very well. When the light comes in the windows just right, you can still see remnants of the smoking crater it left.