Captain America: Last Movie before the First Avengers

Gotta love when a Golden Age comic gets recreated on screen!

I was really looking forward to watching Captain America on the big screen for several reasons:

1) Marvel Studios’ excellent track record.
2) A Golden Age superhero movie actually set during World War Two.
3) A very limited amount emotionally invested in the character.

Jeff's Books to Open Your Mind: Fahrenheit 451

HOLY GUACAMOLE!

How on Earth did I manage to get through all of my formal education without being told to read this Ray Bradbury classic?

Something is seriously amiss.

Kaiju Police

Rodan
(Parody of Roxanne by the Police)
Lyrics by Jeff McGinley
Apologies to Sting, Ishiro Honda, and the Denizens of Monster Island

Of Course I Saw Transformers 3

I may have insinuated that I wasn’t going to be seeing the third segment of Michael Bay’s Transformers story, but I don’t think I fooled anyone, especially me. After all, I own several original Transformers, a few shirts and shorts featuring them, and this is the back of my car.

Even a Hyundai can be more than meets the eye (with Optimus floor mats).

Really, this review was inevitable, especially since they had a script this time. They also figured out how to make the 3D impressively 3D throughout the film. It looked like a visual “surround sound” of the old Disney multi plane camera, as opposed to alternating between merely increasing the depth of field, and doing cheap, eye-pokey jokes. Apologies for the review not being right after a midnight preview, but apparently I occasionally do need to sleep. (Go figure.)

Invasion from Planet No Face, or The Great Doorknob Robbery

Story, Character Creation, Design and Development by Anabelle McGinley

Assembly, and Continuity Editing by Jeff McGinley

Once upon a time, postal worker Ana Belle went to Wal*Mart to buy a new pair of roller skates. She skated everywhere she went, and thought it was much quicker and easier to deliver the mail on them. She found a pair of skates on a pallet in the back of the store, and also a destiny changing chocolate yo-yo. Hungry after her long route; she ate the candy while trying on the skates.

Just then the back doors of Wal*Mart were blown apart by the villainess Chainarina. With a cry of, “Yee Ha, Yippee Ki Ay, You stink if you’re good!” she chased everyone away while jumping mightily around the store. She began wrapping up the pallet with her electric seaweed chains, while absorbing energy from her other glove to power them.

Bad Geek Confessions: Star Trek

Fifty posts and I haven’t mentioned Star Trek yet? I must be slipping.

The True Crew

I’ve been watching Star Trek for as long as I’ve been capable of watching things. (Thanx, Dad.) When it was in its first syndication run, we’d watch it every night (after the vampire shows were done) at dinner. I was young enough that, for a very long time, I had this overall conception of Star Trek undivided into episodes. Tribbles, Klingons, Spock with a Beard and the American flag were all weaved into one highly unusual story in my highly unusual head. I also had the pajamas, the action figures, the communicator walkie talkies, and even the cardboard ears. The Franz Joseph designs in my Dad’s Starfleet Technical Manual were some of the first pages I poured over multiple times.

My enjoyment of the original series and its characters has not dulled over the years.

However, I cannot sit through The Next Generation or any of the other later shows.

A Carnivore's Guide to Cardiology: Drinking Problem

When I started on the major overhaul of all the stuff I ingest, I figured the food alterations would be the most difficult. They’ve actually come off pretty easy. The change in my taste buds has caused even what I WANT to eat to be radically different than it had been in the past. There are all these hidden flavors in various forms of vegetation that I had been missing all these years by blasting my tongue with a plethora of junk food.

Up until recently, I viewed pears as a slightly less flavored apple, but now I can appreciate the variety between different breeds, as long as they’re mushy. (This lets me play “Is it rotten yet?” the home game.) There are apparently different flavors of apple as well, go figure. And how’s this for an amazing discovery? Vegetables can taste different based on how you cook them! Who knew? I realize this may be obvious to most, but considering my reaction to any of them used to be, “Get these freakin’ plants off my plate!” any detection of subtlety is a huge step.

Up the Lake: Fireworks

Kids Having a Blast
Or
Light Fuse and Get Away

The official Up the Lake season begins on July 4th weekend. As it’s in a secluded space, distant from most of civilization, and (most importantly) there’s no TV, fireworks have always been a major part of the summer. When we were growing up, Nick, Skip, and I usually managed to beg, borrow, or steal several packs of firecrackers for ourselves. As these came in precious, limited quantities, we would always carefully unwrap them, and use them one at a time. This allowed the demolition to last as long as possible. We would also use them only on interestingly destroyable items, often saving some complex toy or model all winter long, in order to bring it to an impressive doom at the hands of our creative, destructive, tendencies. Once supplies were truly low, we would have long committee meetings, sometimes for hours, to determine the worthiness of an item’s artistic merit. These meetings would often degrade into arguments, provoking us to waste some of our precious stash by throwing them at each other.

Many brave army men gave their all on these rocks...