BEAST WARS Introduction
Ten years after the Generation One Transformers cartoon ended. Hasbro brought the franchise back in a modified, or as someone who is hilarious might say, "a transformed" way.
Amazingly after Nine to Eleven Million
years of stagnation, in only three hundred years, Cybertronians have evolved.
(Probably not the right word here, “reformatted” seems to be the term of choice.)
Perhaps this is a result of opening the Autobot Matrix of Leadership? They have
smaller, more efficient bodies now. That’s good considering they ran out of
Energon after ten minutes in almost every episode.
Autobots have become the
Maximals. Because they Maximize. Fine, it was a last minute decision to give a
more “Animaly” sounding name that combined The Nissan Maxima and an unused G.I.
Joe concept (and terrible Eighties series) Manimals. I’m trying to stay in
story here.
The Decepticons “descendants” (whatever) are the Predacons. This is
because…um… faulty historical reporting, I believe, because Predaking and his
components were bad at almost everything they attempted.
Anyway, after three hundred
years of peace, the Predacons are starting to stir up an insurrection. (For anyone
keeping count that means wartime was 30,000 times longer than peacetime- which
is sadly about right.) These new Cybertronians also must have worse memories,
because they went from,
“I will keep calling every day for four million years
in case by boss answers.”
To
“The Great War was three hundred years ago and
shrouded in myth.”
Maybe they just wanted to forget the whole Headmasters
thing.
We start with Megatron. (Not the original one, he took the name in homage. They don’t specifically state that until near
the end of the series, but it is pretty clear for multiple reasons.) Megatron and his gang (Dinobot, Scorponok, Terrorsaur, Tarantulas, and Waspinator) steal the Golden
Disk and use a transwarp engine to leave Cybertron in search of the secret
location of Energon the disk reveals.
Optimus Primal (who also took the name in
homage) and his gang (Rhinox, Cheetor, and Rattrap... plus others in stasis) of Maximal scientists and researchers (this will go well)
give chase through both space AND time for this one.
Note- These are all new characters, even ones who share names with ones from the original show.
I was really excited to
see these again. As much as I love Generation One the most, I saw them myriad
times when they first aired. Then reruns here and there followed by at least two (I
think) viewings of the DVD collections. For Beast Wars, I read an
episode guide that came in a book with G1 write ups. Then I saw a few episodes
the first time I visited Rosa in Peru, and watched the DVDs once when they came out
over fifteen years ago.
That means this viewing will be “like new with some
vague memories” rather than the Generation One “ingrained in my psyche
forever.”
Maximals Maximize! (Was that
really it? We’ll see I guess.)
Spoilers- Turns out I was right about the phrase, but a bit less so about the excitement. (Early on, anyway.) This one really built up in quality- and therefore my involvement -as the show continued, though. Because of the “new” nature, but more importantly because these have limited characters, continuing story arcs, are steeped in LORE, and (most importantly) are frequently COMPLETELY insane, the write ups have become more play-by-play than straight reactions.
Beast Wars Season One
The menu is the Maximal base. There are no “bad CGI characters” in the menu presumably because they live in the episodes themselves.
Really, CGI always shows its age. Yeah,
there were art errors in the original series, but this whole thing really looks
clunky and old. (Spoilers- Turns out, you can get used to it.)
De ja vous, we’re opening on a spaceship chase and fight that leads to a crash. The Maximal ship launches stasis pods all over the place, meaning they won’t have to explain new characters later on. Smart!
This planet has two moons. The rest looks… familiar.
The menu is the Maximal base. There are no “bad CGI characters” in the menu presumably because they live in the episodes themselves.
Beast Wars Part 1
De ja vous, we’re opening on a spaceship chase and fight that leads to a crash. The Maximal ship launches stasis pods all over the place, meaning they won’t have to explain new characters later on. Smart!
This planet has two moons. The rest looks… familiar.
Ah, we’re scanning right after the crash instead of having
everyone lay there for four million years this time. Also a good idea.
It is dangerous to emerge from the ships because of the weird energy signatures around. They need protection; therefore they get their alternate Beast Modes. So, this time, it has nothing to do with blending in. This also makes more sense.
Especially since the Maximals selected
all local mammals while the Predacons pulled from bugs and … fossils?
“Look at me, I’m a Cheetah… no I’m Cheetor!”
Wait, I have questions.
A) Why does he know what a cheetah is?
B) Why did they have no names before getting their alternate forms? (Except for the legacy named Optimus and Megatron, of course.)
Now I remember why Rhinox (A Rhinoceros,
duh) is my favorite, he’s a scientist AND a rhinoceros.
The energy of this planet will make their robot forms short out in only a few minutes. Maybe they have not made themselves more efficient after all.
The Predacons were targeting Earth based on the Golden Disk but landed here. So much for that. I thought there was more LORE at the start. I guess not. They really hit the ground running and fill it in later.
The CG transformations do look cool and seem to have all components match as they move. I’ll give them that.
Rattrap (a Rat… a human sized, frequently bipedal rat… whatever) has a New York Italian accent, because of course he does.
They have to say “Maximize” or “Terrorize” when transforming. That’s going to get old. (And why “Terrorize?” Shouldn’t it be “Predacons Predicate” or something?)
At least they do a roll call to
introduce everyone when transforming. I totally forgot there was a Pteranodon.
(Terror-Saur, or some such spelling.)
Cheetor- "Hey! Watch me run fast in unknown territory until I’m completely out of communication range." (I'm paraphrasing.) They’re still morons.
Megatron is a purple tyrannosaur. He is both terrifying and camp.
And Optimus (a Gorilla, hence “Optimus Primal,” also very bipedal) is down. That was fast. Oh good, he’s all right.
It is dangerous to emerge from the ships because of the weird energy signatures around. They need protection; therefore they get their alternate Beast Modes. So, this time, it has nothing to do with blending in. This also makes more sense.
“Look at me, I’m a Cheetah… no I’m Cheetor!”
Wait, I have questions.
A) Why does he know what a cheetah is?
B) Why did they have no names before getting their alternate forms? (Except for the legacy named Optimus and Megatron, of course.)
The energy of this planet will make their robot forms short out in only a few minutes. Maybe they have not made themselves more efficient after all.
The Predacons were targeting Earth based on the Golden Disk but landed here. So much for that. I thought there was more LORE at the start. I guess not. They really hit the ground running and fill it in later.
The CG transformations do look cool and seem to have all components match as they move. I’ll give them that.
Rattrap (a Rat… a human sized, frequently bipedal rat… whatever) has a New York Italian accent, because of course he does.
They have to say “Maximize” or “Terrorize” when transforming. That’s going to get old. (And why “Terrorize?” Shouldn’t it be “Predacons Predicate” or something?)
Cheetor- "Hey! Watch me run fast in unknown territory until I’m completely out of communication range." (I'm paraphrasing.) They’re still morons.
Megatron is a purple tyrannosaur. He is both terrifying and camp.
And Optimus (a Gorilla, hence “Optimus Primal,” also very bipedal) is down. That was fast. Oh good, he’s all right.
Yup, this “a few minutes in robot form
before shorting out” time limit is going to be annoying.
Rattrap is a cowardly weasel, nice to get that out of the way, but why is he here? (Spoilers- He gets better, quickly.)
Megatron isn’t quite like his namesake. Rather than engaging Dinobot (Utahraptor-ish) in single combat after being challenged, he just has Scorponok (a Scorpion, duh… but dinosaur sized, which is still drastically smaller than his city sized namesake) blast him over the horizon. Maybe they are more efficient.
Interesting choice Dinobot, desert the Predacons instantly and challenge for leadership of the Maximals. Starscream you are not.
Rhinox- “This guy’s got bearings of
chrome steel.” I really thought it was brass. Oh well.
Whoah! These are short! A little over a decade later and the run time is four minutes less than the old cartoon.
Ooh! I Forgot Susan Blu (Arcee) was the voice director. Woo!
Rattrap is a cowardly weasel, nice to get that out of the way, but why is he here? (Spoilers- He gets better, quickly.)
Megatron isn’t quite like his namesake. Rather than engaging Dinobot (Utahraptor-ish) in single combat after being challenged, he just has Scorponok (a Scorpion, duh… but dinosaur sized, which is still drastically smaller than his city sized namesake) blast him over the horizon. Maybe they are more efficient.
Interesting choice Dinobot, desert the Predacons instantly and challenge for leadership of the Maximals. Starscream you are not.
Whoah! These are short! A little over a decade later and the run time is four minutes less than the old cartoon.
Ooh! I Forgot Susan Blu (Arcee) was the voice director. Woo!
Not sure if they made the right choice
for the Maximals. The CGI mammals look way worse than the non-furred dinosaurs
and bugs.
Dinobot changed his command word to “Maximize,” meaning:
A) They do need to say it.
B) A switch is much easier than one would think. (A subtle anti-racist hint that the two warring factions are closer than they think they are, perhaps?)
Optimus lays the smack down. That was really quick. I guess the “not designed for military applications” advantage finally wore off after nine million three hundred and twenty-one years.
Wait, Dinobot cheated. So much for being
an honorable warrior. Oh, now he is. Maybe he accidentally cheated.
I’m going to need Optimus and Megatron to stop flirting while they fight.
Optimus Primal is cool, but there are two problems.
A) Having an opening in his robot mode face shield to reveal his mouth looks stupid.
B) He says, “That’s just prime!” far too often.
Most of the transformations work, but Rattrap looks like he’s wearing a dead rat shirt in robot mode…
Dinobot changed his command word to “Maximize,” meaning:
A) They do need to say it.
B) A switch is much easier than one would think. (A subtle anti-racist hint that the two warring factions are closer than they think they are, perhaps?)
Optimus lays the smack down. That was really quick. I guess the “not designed for military applications” advantage finally wore off after nine million three hundred and twenty-one years.
I’m going to need Optimus and Megatron to stop flirting while they fight.
Optimus Primal is cool, but there are two problems.
A) Having an opening in his robot mode face shield to reveal his mouth looks stupid.
B) He says, “That’s just prime!” far too often.
Most of the transformations work, but Rattrap looks like he’s wearing a dead rat shirt in robot mode…
And Rhinox looks like he straight up turns inside out. I guess he wins the Gross Contest.
Holy Cow! A mountain full of Energon! That’s
where the dangerous energy is coming from?
Wait. Didn’t they always have to convert stuff (oll, coal, whatever) into Energon? Now raw Energon is a thing? And its highly unstable. Great.
Not only does being in animal form protect them from the weird Energon, but that’s how they self-repair, handy. Sorry Ratchet and Wheeljack, you’re obsolete.
Gasp. A Henge! I wonder if that will come in to play in important ways? (Spoilers- Yup.)
Optimus flies! That is also handy.
Ooh! A reference to the classic “King Kong fights a Tyrannosaurus Rex” with Megatron facing off against Optimus Primal
in Beast Mode.
Oof, battle damage looks like a glitch
in the artwork.
Yeah, the Maximals are clearly superior in one-on-one combat. The Decepticons really took quite a hit losing the Great War. Good thing the Predacons outnumber them, or this would be a really short series.
A cheap missile shot is going to kill Optimus, oh no! But Dinobot proves he is honorable by deflecting the projectile…
Into the Energon mountain, causing it to blow up and nearly kill the entire cast in episode two.
Yup. Morons.
“So for now, let the battle be here. On this strange primitive world.
And let it be called.
*dramatic pause*
Beast Wars!”
Nice title drop, Primal. But maybe save the dramatic pauses for when the landscape isn’t exploding around you.
Wait. Didn’t they always have to convert stuff (oll, coal, whatever) into Energon? Now raw Energon is a thing? And its highly unstable. Great.
Not only does being in animal form protect them from the weird Energon, but that’s how they self-repair, handy. Sorry Ratchet and Wheeljack, you’re obsolete.
Gasp. A Henge! I wonder if that will come in to play in important ways? (Spoilers- Yup.)
Optimus flies! That is also handy.
Yeah, the Maximals are clearly superior in one-on-one combat. The Decepticons really took quite a hit losing the Great War. Good thing the Predacons outnumber them, or this would be a really short series.
A cheap missile shot is going to kill Optimus, oh no! But Dinobot proves he is honorable by deflecting the projectile…
Into the Energon mountain, causing it to blow up and nearly kill the entire cast in episode two.
Yup. Morons.
“So for now, let the battle be here. On this strange primitive world.
And let it be called.
*dramatic pause*
Beast Wars!”
Nice title drop, Primal. But maybe save the dramatic pauses for when the landscape isn’t exploding around you.
Morons.
Click to Continue
No comments:
Post a Comment