Thursday, October 7, 2021

Family Fairytale Foolishness


I had plans to delve into my Minecraft world creation as a short filler post. Looking over the years of obsessions with decorative tunnelling in both my creative and survival worlds, any hopes of "short" vanished immediately. 

Then I remembered my nephew's Minecraft story. When I went looking for it, I found his "fractured fairy tale" instead,  which is a much better representative of showing the family genes shining through.  It has Minecraft references too.

He wrote this in second grade.  N-joy!!!
The Three Little Pigs and the Big Bad Problems   
By Morgan Luer
    Once upon a time in New Jersey there were 2 pigs.  Their names were Piggy and Pigglesin.  Piggy and Pigglesin were brothers and they were pigs. One night in the winter it snowed a lot. They made a pig out of snow. They put two rocks for eyes. They also put seven rocks for the mouth and two for the nostrils. Then they put ten on the end that made a spiral to create a tail. It made some magic sparkles and then it came to life. They called him their third brother, because they wanted somebody else to play with, and named him Snow.

     They all stayed in their house and played together for a year. After that their Mom said they had to go out on their own because they were getting too big for the house and it was too crowded in the house.

   They all left together and traveled west to California. They were there for only two days when Snow started to melt; because “Snow” wasn’t just his name, he was also made of snow.  Snow whined and yelled “It’s TOO HOT here!"
   Pigglesin agreed “YES! I am really hot too.”

     But Piggy said “It’s just right for me.” So Piggy chose to stay in California and build himself a house of sand.  He added a trap door made of cacti so that only he knew how to get in and out safely.  He knew Pigglesin and Snow would be leaving but he could talk to them on the phone so he was happy in his sand house in California.  He even built a sand car so he could travel. 

     Pigglesin and Snow went to North Pole, Alaska.  Snow said “This is just right for me.”  He invited Pigglesin to stay with him. But Pigglesin said “I’ll help you build a house but this place is still not cold enough for me!” They made a big house made of ice with a trap door made of blue ice blocks that only they knew how to enter and exit safely. 

     Snow was very happy there. He even built an ice car so that he could travel. Soon Pigglesin left.  He traveled all the way to Antarctica.  “This is just right, for me.” he said. He stayed and built a house of snow, with a snow door, that only he could find.  He built a snow car so he could travel.  He was very happy there until he heard giant footsteps approaching the house. It was a giant mutant penguin, it had smelled Pigglesin and wanted some bacon.
     “I WANT BACON, NOW!!!” 
screamed the giant mutant penguin.  Pigglesin tried to defend himself.  He took out his enchanted diamond sword, but he could not hurt the penguin because it was too strong.  Pigglesin ran back inside to hide, and called Piggy and Snow for ideas of what to do next.

     Piggy said, “Just hide until it leaves”.  Pigglesin hid under his bed, but the giant mutant penguin wouldn’t leave. 

     Pigglesin was very scared, he cried out “THAT DIDN’T WORK!” “Snow, do you have any ideas?” 

     Snow replied “If you can get away, you can come live with me.  There are no penguins in Alaska.”

     Pigglesin thought that sounded like a great idea.  “It’s too cold for me here anyway.  I thought it was just right, but I’m freezing all the time.”  Then he built a decoy pig out of snow and while the giant mutant penguin was trying to get bacon from that, Pigglesin snuck away, traveling all the way back to Alaska to live with his brother Snow.”

      While all that was going on, Piggy was finding he had troubles of his own - avocados. He called his brothers to complain.  “I am so tired of avocados.  I don’t like how they taste.”
     Pigglesin tried to be helpful but just wanted to get off the phone quick “Why don’t you just eat something else? I really can’t talk right now, I’m escaping from a giant mutant penguin.”

     Piggy answered “I can’t because everything I have tried to eat has avocados in it, even the pizza!” 

     But Snow was chillin’ billin’ diddley dillin’ and said “Soooo… Why don’t you come live with me? There’s no avocados in what I make.”

     Piggy thought that was a great idea so he hung up the phone, jumped in his sand-mobile and drove to Snow’s house.  

    Time passed by fast.  The pig brothers were really, really, really happy to live together.  They found out that it was more important to them to be together than to have the temperature be “just right”.  Things were going well until one night when someone stole the ice blocks from their house.  It was an invisible person, looking for a place to live.  The person tried to come in the door but couldn’t get past the trap.  Since it couldn’t get in, it stole the house piece by piece. Suddenly Piggy and Pigglesin were both freezing.  Piggy asked “Does anyone else feel a draft?”  Piggy and Pigglesin started to panic.

     Snow thought “My brothers must be crazy, yes we have a problem, but there’s always a solution.”  He started digging. He grabbed his supply of ladders, he put a trap door at the top of the hole and put the ladders in the hole. At the bottom of the hole he made a tiny room.  He called to his brothers “Hey Guys! Come down here, you’ll be nice and warm in here.”  His brothers said “Yes” and came down.  They stayed there for the night. 

     When they woke up they had a discussion. Snow said to Piggy and Pigglesin “Why don’t we go back to New Jersey; sometimes it is cold, sometimes it is hot, and sometimes it is just right. But no matter what the temperature, Mama is always there.”
     Piggy and Pigglesin said “That’s a great idea!” 

     Pigglesin added “And there’s no penguins there!”

     Piggy agreed and said “And they don’t put avocados in everything either."

     Snow replied "There's also no invisible people in New Jersey, at least, I've never seen one."

     They traveled back to New Jersey by plane.  When they got there they went to Mama Pig’s house.  They knocked on the door. When Mama answered they said, “Mama, we love you and missed you.  Can we build a house in your backyard so we can see you more often?”

     Mama thought this was a good idea so she let them do it. She had missed them too. They built a big house in her backyard.  They each had their own room in the house. They could set the temperature to whatever they wanted in their rooms so they were all “just right”, and they were happier than ever because the family was all together again.

Note from Jeff- This is my favorite line:  “Why don’t you just eat something else? I really can’t talk right now, I’m escaping from a giant mutant penguin.”
I will try to work it into conversation whenever possible.


Kim Luer said...

Thank you so much for posting his story. He was both excited and stunned that you put it in your blog. He also laughed for about 10 minutes when I read him this line from you...
Note from Jeff- This is my favorite line: “Why don’t you just eat something else? I really can’t talk right now, I’m escaping from a giant mutant penguin.”
I will try to work it into conversation whenever possible.

Jeff McGinley said...

GLad he was excited, thank you for sending it in the first place.
His style made me think of Jake Johannssen.