Monday, January 9, 2012

Last Friday Night: Engineering School Version

I heard Katy Perry’s “Last Friday Night” recently, and realized that, compared to Friday nights back in college, that song might as well have been written on another planet.

Here are some lyrics that better match the Friday nights I remember at good old Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute.


There's assignments that I dread,
There's equations in my head
Textbooks all over the room
Trash spills out of the bathroom
In the dorm on the weekend
Overwhelmed like all my friends
Dating scene is like a tomb

Too much stress is real old news
Didn’t work last night
Won’t make my deadline
I'm screwed
Oh well
Now I’ve had my break
All-nighter’s a piece of cake.

Last Friday night
Stayed awake till half past three
But we missed the frat party
We were playing D&D

Last Friday night
Watched a bunch of videos
Eating pizza bought from Joe’s
Laughed at Tom Servo and Crow

Last Friday night
We saw Soupy Sales reruns
while we filled out water guns
Puddles made a slippery floor
Last Friday night
Take time off from Coulomb’s law
Sometimes homework’s gotta stop-op
Whoa-oh-oah

This Friday night
Bunch of geeky men
This Friday night
Bunch of geeky men

Cheap Chinese for one and all
Then four hours of pinball
Two AM’s the donut run
We were broke so everyone
Picked two flavors from the wall
Donut guy he hates us all
Doesn’t matter they were stale
Donut run’s an epic fail

Didn’t work last night
Won’t make my deadline
I'm screwed
Oh well
Now I’ve had my break
All-nighter’s a piece of cake.

Damn

Last Friday night
Yeah we tried a bar downtown
State school ladies dancin’ round
They just shook their heads and frowned.

Last Friday night
On a late night PC Quest.
We all shouted out “GO WEST!”
Neighbors wished for our arrest.

Last Friday night
Bought the cheapest of the beer
No cash for good stuff I fear
Spent it at the comic store
Take time off from Newton’s law
Sometimes homework’s gotta stop-op
Whoa-oh-oah

This Friday night
Bunch of geeky men
Bunch of geeky men
This Friday night
Bunch of geeky men
Bunch of geeky men
This Friday night

F is m a.
F is m a.
F is m a.
F is m a.
F is m a.

Last Friday night
Juggled fire in the quad
Student watch yelled “Oh my God!”
Called the public safety squad

Last Friday night
Sledding down library hill
Hit the jump, oh what a spill!
Guys are in the E.R. still.

Last Friday night
Laundry needed to be cleaned
Put too much in the machine
Tons of smoke revealed our flaw

Last Friday night
Take some time off from Murphy’s law
Sometimes the homework’s gotta stop
Oh-whoa-oh
This Friday night
a bunch of geeky men



Who knows?
If this is a hit, there could be other Katy Perry Engineering School songs, like:

“Architecture Gurls (They’re unobtainable)”
Or
“I Kissed a Girl, (then I Woke Up)”

6 comments:

Jesse said...

How did I forget about donut runs?

Antonia Nedder said...

Loved "Juggled Fire in the Quad". That was my favorite line!

longbow said...

Though "Juggled Fire in the Quad" was poetic license.
Pubic Safety came when we were right out front of the E-Dorms.

More truth revealed:
"F is m.a." was shouted all nights of the week.

No Friday Night at Friday's?

Jeff McGinley said...

Thanx to all readers and commenters.

Jesse: Probably due to to the extended Donut Run Hiatus enforced by the Troy Police when someone wss running numbers out of Dunkin's. As you aptly said at the time, "The cops'll never find us here".

Antonia: Thanx, Scott's right though that specific event happened at the E-dorms, though we did get in trouble in the quad during the day for it...and Bar-H...and a few other places.

Scott: Only a limited number of verses, probably would have included Friendly's before Friday's...or Holmes and Watsons...or that weird little bar where I won a bottle of Vodka from a raffle I bought from someone dressed in a Yogi Bear costume...sometimes I'm not sure how much of college was real and how much was stress induced hallucinations.

Brian said...

I also forgot about "donut guy". This was perfectly done Jeff. Great stuff! "go west!"

Jeff McGinley said...

Thanx much Brian, and thanx for being there for most of the inspirational events (to the rest of the E-Dormites too.)

And thanx for the advice that I'll mention in tomorrow's post. (Ooh, forshadowing! Dig me, I'm literary.)