Monday, March 11, 2019

George Awards: “The Many Accidents on the Weekend”

This post contains bad, foul, filthy and unacceptable language - the words that “will curve your spine, grow hair on your hands and maybe, even bring us, God help us, peace without honor.”

This is not a post for children.  Kids, take a hike.
This is also not a post for those adults who are offended by this type of language.  Do yourself a favor, and go read some of my cute stuff before moral outrage can kick in.
Just about everything else on this blog is clean…Stupid sometimes, but clean.
End of Warning.

Although I’m certainly in danger of running out of categories for this insane exercise, there is far from a shortage of material.  Therefore it’s time to use this landmark 850th post to kick off the Sixth Annual George Awards for Profanity in Movies (Click here for intro and explanation) with a transitional piece.

We just finished a journey through the Predator franchise, and while the 1987 original is so overstuffed with awesome, quotable lines to be disqualified from competition…

“I wouldn’t wish that on a broke dick dog,” 
springs to mind.

However, the two newest entries had some fantastic moments.

Last year's The Predator is overstuffed as well.  It’s not with Eighties era over the top macho awesome this time, but there are near constant streams of profanity from most members.  In general, the overload would remove it from consideration as it becomes diluted.

Yet there is one quiet moment where Olivia Munn as Doctor Casey Bracket, easily the most classically intelligent character in the film, demonstrates she will be able to hold her own with a group of mentally damaged, foul mouthed soldiers.  After spending her career as an evolutionary biologist thinking about alien life forms, her reaction to finally seeing one is a soft yet heartfelt declaration, and also a modification of the franchise’s catchphrase:

“You are one beautiful motherfucker.”

An even more deserving moment comes from 2010’s Predators.  While not quite as foul mouthed as the gang from the later Shane Black film, this group does well for themselves since everyone has some form of military or criminal combat experience.

That is everyone except Edwin, the doctor (played by Topher Grace) with a dark secret. (How dark depends on how much of the movie you’ve seen.)

When the group comes up with a plan to take down the unknown creature in the unfamiliar terrain, there’s a spectacular Sixties sit com style cut from him shooting down the idea of being used as bait to running through the jungle in fear of his life.

After being rescued in the nick of time by a sniper’s bullet, his statement to the rest of the group is just as heartfelt as Casey's, but at a considerably higher and more anger fueled, yet out of breath, volume:

 ALL OF YOU!!!!!”

That’s about all for the transitions, come back next week and click here for a proper introduction to this year’s awards.

Or technically, the third introduction to this year’s awards.

Did I mention I’m running out of categories?

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