Mystery Star Trek Into Darkness Theater

On the movie starting:
Anabelle- *Much cheering and Woo!ing*
“I really like these.”
Me- “I’ve noticed.”
 
On Spock in the volcano:
Kirk- “Spock, nobody knows rules better than you, but there has got to be an exception.”
Spock- “None.
Such action violates the Prime Directive.”
McCoy- “Shut up, Spock. We're trying to save you, damn it.”
Spock- “Doctor, the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few.”
Anabelle- “Not this again.”
…
Kirk- “If Spock were here and I were there, what would he do?”
McCoy- “He'd let you die.”
Rosa- “Why?”
Me- “Prime Directive.”
Anabelle- “It’s much more important in this universe.
They have to leave this planet anyway. I’m sure they’ll figure it out.”
….
Kirk- “You just saved the world.”
Spock- “You violated the Prime Directive.”
Kirk- “Oh, come on, Spock. They saw us. Big deal.”
*The aliens who saw the ship leave sketch and start worshiping an image of the Enterprise*
Anabelle- “This is fine. 
*emotionless* Woo. Hooray.”
 
On Benedict Cumberbatch showing up to make an offer to Mickey from Doctor Who:
Harrison- “I can save her.”
Rosa- “Oh, it’s him.”
Anabelle- “him?  HIM!? You forgot him?”
 
On Kirk being interrupted by a communicator:
Anabelle- “Beep be deep be deep boop boop
I can still do that, you know.”
 
On “Mickey” adding something to his daughter’s IV:
Anabelle- *singing* “Nothing going on here.
Definitely not adding random blood to tubes at the hospital.” 
 
On the attack on Starfleet Headquarters:
Pike- “Emergency session, Daystrom. That's us.”
Anabelle- “Ooh Daystrom…
I feel like I know that name.”
Me- “He’s the guy who made the M5 computer.”
Anabelle- “Oh yeah… I hate that guy.”
…
Kirk- “I'm familiar with your compulsion to follow the rules, but you see, I can't do that.
Where I come from, if someone saves your life, you don't stab him in the back.”
Spock- “Vulcans cannot lie.”
Anabelle- “Yes, they can.”
*pause*
“Clown.”
…
Admiral Marcus- “Thank you for convening on such short notice…”
Anabelle- “Hey! What’s up?”
Me- “It’s Robocop.”
Anabelle- “I know.
That’s why I said, ‘Hey! What’s up?’”
…
Kirk- “It doesn't seem odd to you that he'd target an archive? It's like bombing a library.”
Marcus- “Chris, Everything okay there?”
Pike- “Yes, sir. Mister Kirk is just acclimating to his new position as First Officer.”
Anabelle- “No he’s not. He’s saying something important because Kirk is smart sometimes.” 
Marcus- “You got something to say, Kirk, say it. Tomorrow's too late.”
Kirk- “I'm fine, sir. My apologies.”
Marcus- “Spit it out, son. Don't be shy.”
Kirk- “Why the archive? All that information is public record, and if he really wanted to damage Starfleet, this could just be the beginning.”
Marcus- “The beginning of what, Mister Kirk?”
Kirk- “Sir, in the event of an attack, protocol mandates that senior command gather captains and first officers at Starfleet HQ, right here. In this room.”
Anabelle- “Did you see Spock’s eyes? He knows something’s up.”
Spock- “It is curious Harrison would commandeer a jumpship without warp capabilities.”
Anabelle- “See, now he’s agreeing with Kirk.”
…
*Huge attack on Starfleet Headquarters with much shooting*
Anabelle and Rosa- *Near constant screams and yells*
Anabelle- “Do you think people live near HQ?”
Me- “Sure, it’s in the middle of the city.”
Anabelle- “No, I meant willingly?”
*Pike is down. Spock mind-melds. Kirk arrives too late*
Anabelle- “Look, Kirk is touching Pike’s shoulder. His love language.”
 
On the aftermath of the attack:
Anabelle- “Look it’s an Ambulance-acopter.” 
Kirk- “Well, can you figure out where he went?”
Scotty- “I already did, sir, and you're no gonna like it.
*Shows location in Klingon space*
He's gone to the one place we…
we just can't go.”
Anabelle- “Kirk’s like ‘I can’.”
Rosa- “Why?”
Anabelle- “He’s Captain Kirk.
It’s like the Romulan exception he has in the Original Series.
He goes so often they don’t care anymore.”
…
Marcus- “All-out war with the Klingons is inevitable, Mister Kirk. If you ask me, it's already begun. Since we first learned of their existence, the Klingon Empire has conquered and occupied two planets that we know of and fired on our ships half a dozen times. They are coming our way. London was not an archive. it was a top-secret branch of Starfleet designated Section 31. They were developing defense technology and training our officers to gather intelligence on the Klingons and any other potential enemy who means to do us harm. Harrison was one of our top agents.”
Anabelle- “Section what now?”
Me- “Starfleet secret service. Deep Space Nine invented them.”
Anabelle- “Cool.”
…
Marcus- “Pike always said you were one of our best and brightest. You should have heard him defend you. He's the one who talked you into joining Starfleet, wasn't he?”
Kirk- “Yes, sir.”
Marcus- “Did he ever tell you who talked him into joining?”
Rosa- “Him?”
Anabelle- “Yes. That’s implied.”
Rosa- “Ah.”
 
On Jim reconnecting with Bones after the attack:
McCoy- “Jim! Where were you?”
Kirk- “For what?”
McCoy- “Your medical exam.
Ten hours ago, you were in a damn firefight. Now it's my duty as ship's…”
Kirk- “I'm fine, Bones.”
McCoy- “The hell you are.”
Anabelle- “I love it when Kirk refuses a medical exam.”
 
On the mission to shoot torpedoes at the Klingon homeworld:
Spock- “As I am again your First Officer, it is now my duty to strongly object to our mission parameters.”
…
McCoy- “Wait a minute. We're firing torpedoes at the Klingons?”
Anabelle- “I love him.”
…
Carol- “Captain Kirk. Science Officer Wallace. I've been assigned to the Enterprise by Admiral Marcus. These are my transfer orders.”
Spock- “You requested an additional science officer, Captain?”
Anabelle- “Spock’s like, ’m… excuse me! Am I not good enough for you?’"
Rosa- “She looks suspicious.”
Anabelle- “You’ll have to watch.”
 
On Kirk’s tension levels after losing his mentor, arguing with his senior staff, and firing Scotty:
Uhura- “Captain. I'm so sorry about Admiral Pike.”
Kirk- “We all are.”
Uhura- “Are you okay?”
Anabelle- “No. This man is never OK.
No one on this ship is ever OK.”
 
On Chekov becoming chief engineer:
Anabelle- “He’s more engineering than science in these movies.
Notice how, when he changes position, he wears a different color shirt.
Wouldn’t that be interesting?” 
 
On the Kelvin timeline bridge:
Anabelle- “It’s weird Spock’s and Uhura’s stations are reversed.”
*Kirk sits in The Chair*
Anabelle- “Note how he only pressed the buttons on the LEFT side of the chair.
*whispers* ‘Cause the one on the right side shoots crewmen into space. Weee!”
 
On Kirk passing the Conn:
Kirk- “Mister Sulu, you have the conn. Once we're en route, I want you to transmit a targeted comm burst to Harrison's location. You tell him you have a bunch of real big torpedoes pointed at his head and if he doesn't play nice, you're not afraid to use them. ls that a problem?”
Sulu- “No, sir. I've just never sat in the chair before.”
Anabelle- “Yeaaaah!!! Woo hoo!
We love you Sulu!
I love how people replace stations so fast.  
Where do they come from?”
McCoy- *whispering* “Jim, wait. You just sat that man down at a high stakes poker game with no cards and told him to bluff. Now Sulu's a good man, but he is no captain.”
…
Sulu- “Attention, John Harrison. This is Captain Hikaru Sulu of the USS Enterprise. A shuttle of highly trained officers is on its way to your location. If you do not surrender to them immediately, I will unleash the entire payload of advanced long-range torpedoes currently locked onto your location. You have two minutes to confirm your compliance. Refusal to do so will result in your obliteration. If you test me, you will fail.”
Anabelle- “WHOAH! Bones is like, ‘OOOH, I guess I was wrong.’”
McCoy- “Mister Sulu, remind me never to piss you off.”
Anabelle- “SO REAL!”
 
On the in disguise team being surrounded by Klingons:
Uhura- “We're outnumbered, outgunned. There's no way we survive if we attack first. You brought me here because I speak Klingon. Then let me speak Klingon.”
Anabelle- *Stares at me, still seething about the book translation scene in Star Trek VI*
“Real.”
Kirk- “This isn't going to work.”
Spock- “It is our only logical option. And if you interrupt her now, you will not only incur the wrath of the Klingons, but that of Lieutenant Uhura as well. “
Anabelle- “GIRLBOSSQUEEN!”
*The new look Klingons are revealed*
Anabelle- “Ewww. We hate to see it.
I hate Klingons.”
*Harrison shows up to attack the Klingons and shoots down a ship with a MASSIVE gun*
Anabelle- “Not him having a giant cannon. That’s normal.”
 
On Harrison’s speech in the brig:
Anabelle- “He is terrifying.”
Me- “Khan’s always had a gift for speaking.”
Anabelle- “SHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!”
Rosa- *on brief trip to kitchen* “Did you say something?”
Anabelle- “Nothing!”
 
On showing the main view screen is actually a window on this Enterprise:
Anabelle- “That is… a choice.”
 
On fashion:
Anabelle- “Uhura’s got her earrings back on.
She took them off when in disguise.
I do not have to say that I love them.”
 
On Kirk calling Scotty:
Scotty- “Oh, well now. If it isn't Captain James Tiberius Perfect Hair.
*Aside to Keenser* Did you hear that? I called him Perfect Hair.”
Anabelle and Me- *Laughs and falls off couch* “I love him.”
 
On learning there is a man in one of the torpedoes:
Rosa- “I’m kind of remembering.”
Anabelle- “Finally!  
Also, Dad spoiled the whole movie a while ago.”
Rosa- “What did he say.”
Anabelle- “I’m not going to tell you now!!”
Harrison- “A remnant of a time long past. Genetically engineered to be superior so as to lead others to peace in a world at war. But we were condemned as criminals, forced into exile. For centuries we slept, hoping when we awoke things would be different. But as a result of the destruction of Vulcan, your Starfleet began to aggressively search distant quadrants of space. My ship was found adrift. I alone was revived.”
Kirk- “I looked up John Harrison. Until a year ago, he didn't exist.”
Harrison- “John Harrison was a fiction created the moment I was awoken by your Admiral Marcus to help him advance his cause. A smokescreen to conceal my true identity.
My name…   
is Khan.”
Anabelle- *fake* “gasp!”
Rosa- “Him?!”
Anabelle- “I hate Khan.
I’ve been waiting this whole movie to say that, but I didn’t want to spoil it.”
…
Khan- “He used my friends to control me. I tried to smuggle them to safety by concealing them in the very weapons I had designed, but I was discovered. I had no choice but to escape alone. And when I did, I had every reason to suspect that Marcus had killed every single one of the people I hold most dear. So I responded in kind. My crew is my family, Kirk. ls there anything you would not do for your family?”
*Sheds single tear*
Anabelle- “He slayed this.”
 
On the USS Vengeance popping out of warp to attack them:
Anabelle- “W-bam!!! Giant ship!”
*The Vengeance can chase and shoot them at warp*
Anabelle- “AAAH!  Why am I stressed.
I know how this movie ends?”
Me- “’Cause movies is magic!”
*The Vengeance blows holes in the Enterprise hull*
Anabelle- “Aaaaa!
It must be wild falling out of a ship at warp.”
*The Vengeance suddenly powers down*
Scotty- “Guess what I found behind Jupiter.”
Anabelle and Rosa- “YEAH!!!!”
 
On Kirk visiting Khan in sick bay to recruit him to attack the Vengeance:
Anabelle- *whispers* “Why do they have a dead Tribble there?”
 
On Kirk and Khan being fired out of the airlock:
Anabelle- “Weeee!
They used the button on the big chair.”
 
On calling Spock Prime:
Spock- “I will be brief. In your travels, did you ever encounter a man named Khan?”
Anabelle- *laughs nervously* “Yeeeeees.”
Spock- “As you know, I have made a vow never to give you information that could potentially alter your destiny. Your path is yours to walk, and yours alone. That being said…”
Anabelle- “I hate Khan!”
Spock Prime- “Khan Noonien Singh is the most dangerous adversary the Enterprise ever faced. He is brilliant, ruthless, and he will not hesitate to kill every single one of you.”
Anabelle- *as Spock* “I’ll withdraw now.”
Spock- “Did you defeat him?”
Spock Prime- “At great cost. Yes.”
Spock- “How?”
Anabelle- “With my little oven mitts.”
 
On Spock asking Bones if he can replicate activating a torpedo:
McCoy- “Damn it, man, I'm a doctor, not a torpedo technician!”
Anabelle- “I love this man.”
 
On the Vengeance powering up again:
Anabelle- “This is bad. So bad!”
 
On Kirk and Khan entering the bridge shooting everyone:
Anabelle- “Woo! Bang! Bang bang!”
*Scotty shoots Khan*
Anabelle- “Bang! Ha ha!”
Kirk- “Admiral Marcus, you're under arrest.”
Marcus- “You're not actually going to do this, are you?”
Kirk- “Admiral, get out of the chair.”
Marcus- “You'd better stop and think about what you're doing, Kirk. You'd better think about what you did on Qo'noS. You made an incursion onto an enemy planet. You killed a Klingon patrol. Even if you got away without a trace, war is coming. And who is going to lead us? You? If I'm not in charge, our entire way of life is decimated!
So if you want me off this ship, you better kill me.”
Anabelle- “I love when Starfleet high ranking personnel start wars.
Which happens often, I’ve noticed.”
 
On Khan waking up from being stunned very quickly:
Rosa and Anabelle- “Aaaaaaaaaaahhh!”
*Khan breaks Carol’s leg*
Rosa and Anabelle- “Aaaaaaaaaaahhh!”
*Khan grabs Marcus’s head*
Khan- “You should have let me sleep.”
Anabelle- “This is fine.”
*CRUNCH - Squelching*
Anabelle- “There he goes!” 
 
On Khan’s demands to the Enterprise:
Khan- “Your crew for my crew.”
Spock- “You betrayed us.”
Anabelle- “Of course. Khan sucks.”
…
Spock- “If you destroy our ship, you will also destroy your own people.”
Khan- “Your crew requires oxygen to survive, mine does not. I will target your life support systems located behind the aft nacelle.”
Anabelle- “They say ‘nacelle’ so often in these.
I hate that I know what it means.”
Khan- “And after every single person aboard your ship suffocates, I will walk over your cold corpses to recover my people. Now, shall we begin?”
Anabelle- “He’s just so pleasant.”
*He kicks Jim*
Anabelle- “Stop kicking Kirk. That’s not nice.”
Spock- “Lower shields.”
Khan- “A wise choice, Mister Spock. I see your seventy-two torpedoes are still in their tubes. If they are not mine, Commander, I will know it.”
Spock- “Vulcans do not lie. The torpedoes are yours.”
Anabelle- “I love Spock.  
The only time he says that is when he is, basically, lying.”
…
Khan- “Well, Kirk, it seems apt to return you to your crew. After all,
*Kirk and Carol beam to Enterprise*
no ship should go down without her captain.”
Sulu- “He’s locking phasers on us!”
*Vengeance pummels the Enterprise*
Anabelle- “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!” *Many times*
*Spock detonates the torpedoes he beamed aboard*
Anabelle- “I love Spock!
Ha! Ha! That’s what you get!”
 
On the Enterprise’s heavy damage:
Sulu- “Commander, our ship's caught in Earth's gravity.”
Spock- “Can we stop?”
Sulu- “l can't do anything.”
Anabelle- “I love it when Sulu has a nervous breakdown.”
 
On the ship starting to crash on earth:
Spock- “I order you to abandon the ship!”
Sulu- “All due respect, Commander, but we're not going anywhere.”
*activates seatbelt*
Anabelle- “I love when the crew forcefully does nothing. 
I love you Sulu.”
 
On Scotty and Kirk falling off a gangway in engineering as the ship spins:
Chekov- *catching them* “I've got you, Keptin!”
Rosa- “Awww.” *Sad moment*
 
On Kirk going into the radiation chamber:
Kirk- “You’re not making the climb.”
*Knocks out Scotty*
Anabelle- “Slay.
Not slay.
This is bad.
But slay.”
*Kirk enters the chamber*
Rosa- “Does he die in this one?”
Anabelle- “Yes Then the next one they find his body and climb the steps.”
Rosa- “No, stop that.”
*Kirk fixes the ship and saves it, Spock finds him*
Kirk- “How's our ship?”
Spock- “Out of danger. You saved the crew.”
Kirk- “You used what he wanted against him. That's a nice move.”
Spock- “It is what you would have done.”
Kirk- “And this, this is what you would have done. it was only logical.
I'm scared, Spock. Help me not be. How do you choose not to feel?”
Spock- “I do not know. Right now, I am failing.”
Kirk- “I want you to know why I couldn't let you die. Why I went back for you.”
Spock- “Because you are my friend.”
*Vulcan salute through the glass, Kirk dies*
Spock- *visible building rage* “KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!”
Me- *cleans eyes* “That’s really a hell of a scene. Not just a copy.
It works as a tribute with the ‘what you would have done’ but still very much on its own.”
Rosa and Anabelle- *Openly weeping*
 
On Khan targeting the crashing Vengeance on Starfleet Headquarters:
Anabelle- *wipes tears* “I’m telling you people should not live here.
*The ship crashes*
R.I.P. Starfleet Headquarters…
again.” 
 
On Spock running after Khan:
Rosa and Anabelle- *Both laughing and making fun of Spock’s hair when he runs*
*The formerly dead tribble with Khan’s blood injected into it wakes up*
McCoy- “Get me a cryo tube, now!”
*Spock jumps on the garbage ship Khan is on, a kick makes Spock drop his phaser*
Rosa- *groans*
Anabelle- “And he’s wearing the stupid phaser belt.
It would be hypocritical of me not to make fun of it.”
*The fight continues, Spock snaps Khan’s arm*
Rosa- *screams*
*Uhura beams in and stuns Khan multiple times
Spock starts whaling on him*
Anabelle- “Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!”
Uhura- “Spock! Spock, stop! Stop! He's our only chance to save Kirk!”
Anabelle- “Girl, you should have led with that!”
 
On Kirk’s recovery:
Kirk- “You saved my life.”
McCoy- “Uhura and I had something to do with it, too, you know.”
Spock- “You saved my life, Captain, and the lives of…”
Kirk- “Spock, just. *frustrated pause* Thank you.”
Spock- “You are welcome…
Jim.”
Rosa, Anabelle and Me- “Awwwww.”
 
On the voice over when Khan and company are placed back in their tubes:
Kirk- “There will always be those who mean to do us harm. To stop them, we risk awakening the same evil within ourselves. Our first instinct is to seek revenge when those we love are taken from us. But that's not who we are. We are here today to rechristen the USS Enterprise, and to honor those who lost their lives nearly one year ago. When Christopher Pike first gave me his ship, he had me recite the Captain's Oath, words I didn't appreciate at the time. Now I see them as a call for us to remember who we once were, and who we must be again. And those words?
Space, the final frontier…”
Anabelle- *screams incoherently then dances throughout*
Kirk- “These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. Her five-year mission, to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations, to boldly go where no one has gone before.”
 
On the finale with the crew on the bridge:
Kirk- “Excellent. Come on, Bones! It's gonna be fun.”
McCoy- “Five years in space. God help me.”
Anabelle- “I love him so much.”
Kirk- “Doctor Marcus. I'm glad you could be a part of the family.”
Carol- “It's nice to have a family.”
Rosa- “Awww… Wait a minute.” *suggestively* “He-ey.”
Kirk- “Spock.”
Spock- “Captain.”
Kirk- “Where shall we go?
Spock- “As a mission of this duration has never been attempted, I defer to your good judgement, Captain.”
Anabelle- “And he’s got the little Spock smirk going again.”
Kirk- “Mister Sulu, take us out.”
Sulu- “Aye, Captain.”
Anabelle- “Woooooo!”
*Enterprise goes to warp*
Anabelle- “W-BANG!”
*Original Series Theme Plays*
Anabelle- “Sings along to opera and instrumental parts at the top of her lungs into my face*

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