Ninth George / Dana Awards Poetic/ Musical Finale Part 2

 

 Warning

This post contains bad, foul, filthy and unacceptable language - the words that “will curve your spine, grow hair on your hands and maybe, even bring us, God help us, peace without honor.”

This is not a post for children.  Kids, take a hike.

This is also not a post for those adults who are offended by this type of language.  Do yourself a favor, and go read some of my cute stuff before moral outrage can kick in.

Just about everything else on this blog is clean…Stupid sometimes, but clean.

End of Warning.

Here we are, really, at the end of this year's  George Awards.

Yes, I split this into two posts when it could have easily been one, and used the same header photo because... 

I am a lazy bastard.

As I like to end with a musical number, instead of something blue, we'll use something BLUES!

And: Because Dana DeLorenzo continues to be awesome, and the only human being to be publicly excited about George Awards (outside of me...and my mother, Hi Mom!), we'll end this year with an extra (and musical) Dana Award for Profanity in Television to thank her yet again.

The Witcher earned a spot in the first Dana Awards, but that only focused on Geralt's exasperated swearing.  

Yennifer's rage filled profanity is wonderful and other characters have their moments. 

But today, to honor the idea of a musical send off, we will focus on Jaskier the Bard, played by Joey Batey.  As an eloquent performer, his use of foul language has already reached meme status:

(Whoever made this meme- feel free to contact me for a Dana Award credit.)

However, the focus is on his musical talent this time. Batey started contributing to the character's songs in Season Two, amazingly making them more fun and catchy than the already fabulous earworms of the previous season's tunes.

For a Dana Award worthy finale then, let us focus on "Whoreson Prison Blues."

While the full orchestra version (click there to hear) is impressive and artistic, it is the on screen performance that truly merits Dana Award recognition for several reasons:

A) It is sung for a one person audience, his jailer, and done solely to annoy him.

B) It is brimming with the rawness that makes profanity a great addition.

C) There are several mice in the cell which he both criticizes and compliments as back up singers.

D) Without benefit of his lute, it is full bore acapella belting where he awesomely accompanies himself on the spoons.

The full version lyrics are below.

The cell version is truncated so find the starting point and SING ALONG!!!!

 It's been a long time travellin'

On roads that lead to nowhere

With hopes and dreams that always rot

Sometimes it takes a prison cell

The tricks and tales, the traitors' tell

To help you see that freedom is all you've got

If I had to do it over, I'd do it all again

The wind don't cower to powerful men

So lock me up and sock me up

And throw away the key

Go fuck yourself, you whoreson

'Cause you're through fuckin' with me

You learn the more you live

They say "don't settle for your lot"

Opinions are like arseholes, which еverybody's got

So lock me up and sock me up

And throw away thе key

Go fuck yourself, you whoreson

'Cause you're through fuckin' with me

Oh, lock me up and sock me up

And throw away the key

Go fuck yourself, you whoreson

'Cause you're through fuckin' ...

with me.

The song is so terminally catchy, I was humming it constantly after I saw the episode.

This caused huge problems when someone caught me doing so during an online meeting when I forgot to mute my microphone.

I had to pretend that I had zoned out so much, I didn't know what I was humming. 

For the ninth time, this yearly descent into naughty language has reached its conclusion.

Thank you all for taking the journey with me once more.

The George Awards will return...

With their Tenth Anniversary Bash!
(I wonder what the fuck I'm going to do?)