Thursday, May 11, 2023

Some Slacking is More Slackful Than Other Slacking

"Great googley moogely, he's still talking about that stupid twelve year old game?"

Yes...yes I am.

Most evenings when I play Fight Night Champion I am looking for a way to make it challenging.

I'll watch the A.I. play both sides of a fight, then pick the loser and try to reverse the outcome...
Or pick the winner and try to get a faster knockout....
Or both.

Sometimes I'll try to fight up a weight class or two to add to the challenge.

All while having a glass of wine to add even more to the challenge.

In the quest to make the game more difficult, I created the equivalent of a "Monster Heel" in professional wrestling. While I had already created "Dad" as a middleweight with maxed out statistics, this new one was overkill.

"Grond Graves" has all of the skills and statistics as high as they can be set. He fights defensively, but with a mix of lightning combinations and powerful punches to cause the most damage. I have never heard the announcers call him "The Dark Destroyer." I believe the game was making fun of me with that option.

As big a fan as I am of Middle Earth, his first name is actually taken from an unstoppable character in the Fineous Fingers comic strip from Dragon Magazine.

Also he has a height and reach set to the tallest and longest possible. Combined with his speed, he's near impossible to get out of the way of.

I created him as an opponent to really test my skills in the game...

Most weekends, anyway.

However, some weeks were long enough and tiring enough,
(and crappy enough)
to remove any need for a challenge. 
I was simply looking to unwind by virtually pummeling the snot out of a parade of virtual opponents.

Therefore, I have decided to end this series of Fight Night Champion posts by documenting when I played as Grond, with his massive happy face tattooed arms battering his way through the "Rocky Gauntlet.

If it wasn't obvious, these posts, like those fights were a way to slack off and blow off steam while expending minimal effort to keep the blog going.

Hey, did you write a novel length Disney World Travelogue recently?
I didn't think so.

Half of the fictional (or fictionalish in one case) fighters didn't last a round against the monstrosity that is "The Dark Destroyer."

Balboa, Lang and Gunn all have a tendency to throw bunches of movie style power shots without protecting themselves The result is them draining their reserves quickly, and setting themselves up for rapid destruction. Note, some of the videos have speeded up sections to save file size when Grond's opponents miraculously stayed away from him for extended periods between strikes.

Yes, the match up against the Italian Stallion ended after only three of Grond's sledgehammer blows.

The rumor that I got cocky trying to avenge Clubber lasting into a second round, and over did it leading to an unconscious Grond before resetting the bout and trying again with a full on assault on his mohawked noggin has not been substantiated.  (Ahem...take 2)

Gotta give Tommy some credit for protecting himself as long as he did..
After being dropped immediately, that is.

Many thanks are due to Rosa for figuring out how to fix all the videos since they were sideways. (Should have checked that before uploading.)

The other three fights were pseudo exceptions. 
None were excessively long, but at least they weren't instantaneous.

Apollo Creed in his prime as the heavyweight champion of the world!
Modeled on Muhammad Ali!
The Count of Monte Fisto!

He lasted about three rounds and it went worse than when the older version of the character met Drago in Rocky IV.

Drago himself lasted quite a while.
Granted it was the only time he was cleanly out fought for almost the entire match. Carnera had a reach advantage...but nothing else. This was different. Losing all of his normal benefits, (range, stamina and power) and factoring in Graves's speed as well, it was fun derailing the Siberian Express (can't believe I made it this far without doing that joke before) in the same way he usually picks apart opponents.
Drago was down once the the eighth, and a crumpled heap in the ninth.

As always, Mason "The Line" Dixon's staying power was surprising.  (You'd think after him lasting so many rounds every single time I've seen him in the game it would stop being surprising. However, as mentioned, I play the game late and night, and usually have a glass of wine or something...maintaining that element of surprise.)

Though impressive against Grond translates to only six rounds.
Still, it took being flattened by the monster four times to put him out of the match. Over that period, though bleeding heavily, he managed to land eleven counter punches, along with multiple other body blows that damaged Grond's core, and would have eventually weakened Graves...if Grond didn't nearly tear his head off that is.

I've run out of gaming photos and videos, meaning I suppose I'll have to get back to real writing. 

However, in the immortal words of Kermit the Frog:
"But BEFORE we go...." 

Does anyone else out there besides me enjoy these?
(Yes, I know you do Mom. Its genetic, put your hand down.
We've covered the fact that these posts are basically for you and me.)

If so, let me know in the comments what other fighters anyone is interested in seeing take on the "Rocky Gauntlet."  

Maybe from:

 When there Were Giants- Shavers, Norton. Holmes

Old School Champions- Patterson, Louis, Johnson, Dempsey, Liston

Later Belt Holders- Lewis, Holyfield, The Klitchko Brothers

Underdogs- LaStarza, Wepner, comeback Foreman

One of the actual Rocky Characters- The game does let boxers fight themselves

90's USA Tuesday Night Fighters- Thunder, Golota... 
Butterbean? (Just kidding, I'm a gamer not a magician)

For extra challenge- Light Heavyweights- Jones Sr and Jr, Adonis Creed and opponents from his first film (The EA server support for this game went down before the sequels, alas.)

Super Extra Challenge- Middleweights
Classic era- Robinson, LaMotta,
Vegas Era- Leonard, Hagler, Hearns, probably some others, those guys bounced around between weight classes a lot, I don't think Duran and De La Hoya are there but I could be wrong. (Again... glass of wine.)

Yes, I'm looking for an excuse to slack off again ...aren't we all?

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